Monthly News — November
In this newsletter you will find: Why accountability is so important to the healing process, the review of the month, an online conference that combines two of my favorite things - psychedelics & design. Keep reading!
Accountability: Why It’s So Important To The Healing Process.
In September’s blog post, I shared my Triple A approach to healing and integration: awareness, accountability & acceptance. Awareness brings the clarity to see yourself and your experiences without judgment, acknowledging your true feelings and patterns as they arise. It’s the light that illuminates the path forward to healing and growth. However, there is a second, very critical step on the road to transformation: accountability. Until we find the courage to examine how our own behavior & core beliefs have shaped our lives, relationships, and experiences, true healing, acceptance, and peace tend to remain out of reach.
Why Is Accountability So Hard?
For one thing, in our culture today we don’t often see great examples of other adults and leaders taking accountability. No matter your political affiliation or profession, I think we all can agree that our leaders stopped taking accountability for their mistakes and lessons learned many years ago. “The buck stops here,” is a phrase and attitude severely lacking in public spaces today. As children, we often copy the behavior and actions of the adults in our lives. It’s by example that we learn the communication skills necessary to navigate our own emotions and relationships. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way to adulthood, many of us internalize the core belief that taking accountability is admitting failure and failure is a sure fire road to rejection, shame and disrespect. Our self worth often gets tied up in this core belief that we must be perfect to be loved. But what if the opposite was true?
Humility: The Path to Deeper Connections.
At its core, accountability is an exercise in humility. We must surrender to the fact that we are imperfect human beings. We all make mistakes. We all hurt others through our actions. We all have succumbed to our egos, taking the avoidance and deflection paths rather than owning up to our own stuff. Yet, true humility requires vulnerability and vulnerability is the olive branch to forming deeper, more meaningful connections with others. When we choose the courageous path of accountability and remain open to honest feedback fueled by the desire to improve ourselves and our relationships, we create trust, intimacy, and growth. In fact, I would go as far to say that practicing humility is a great litmus test for the health of our core relationships. When trauma, resentment & betrayal are at play, the people who are able to hold space for humility and accountability are typically invested in healing the relationship and ready to move forward in a more meaningful direction. Those who are not yet ready for that level of vulnerability typically have more healing to do themselves before they are able to mend relationships with others.
Practice Makes Progress.
The next time a situation arises where you begin to feel attacked, defensive, or shameful, accept that you are not perfect. Remind yourself that this is an opportunity to seek growth and connection. Acknowledge that there is always more to learn. Recognize that your views, opinions and core beliefs are fluid and may change at different stages of your life and relationships and that’s ok. In fact, evolving views, opinions and core beliefs may be a sign of growth and emotional wisdom. Accept that you may be wrong (and that’s ok). Forgive yourself for not always getting it right and practice getting comfortable with your humanity. Through your own accountability practice, you may begin to influence and inspire others in your life to follow suit.
How Psilocybin May Support Your Accountability Practice.
Psilocybin, the active compound in psychedelic mushrooms, often promotes a sense of ego dissolution or separation, which may enhance accountability in several ways:
Perspective Shift: By reducing the sense of self, psilocybin can help individuals see themselves and their actions from a more objective viewpoint. This can foster greater awareness of how their behaviors affect others.
Emotional Insight: The experience often leads to increased emotional openness, allowing individuals to confront feelings and behaviors they may typically avoid. This can enhance self-reflection and personal responsibility.
Connection to Others: Many users report a heightened sense of interconnectedness with others. This feeling can motivate individuals to consider their actions more carefully and feel a stronger sense of responsibility towards others.
Reduced Fear of Judgment: Ego dissolution can decrease the fear of social judgment, enabling individuals to confront their shortcomings and mistakes without the usual defensive reactions.
Integration of Experience: After a psilocybin experience, individuals often feel compelled to integrate insights gained into their daily lives, leading to more accountable behavior in the long term.
If you are interested in exploring whether or not psilocybin may be right for you, I’m happy to offer support. Book a free consultation to get started and let’s explore options that may work best for you!
Review of the Month
“It’s been exactly a month since I successfully quit nicotine! It hasn’t been easy at all, but quitting was something I honestly never thought I would be able to do. I wasn’t even interested in quitting prior to our session. I truly believe the mushrooms played a huge role in my decision to quit. Once I made the decision I was somehow able to stick with it and not look back.
This is a huge positive change for me. I’m so excited to continue this journey of personal growth and I’m extremely grateful for the support and guidance you provided me.”
How Do You Know If Integration Is Working?
Clients who have big breakthroughs and insights during their psilocybin journey are often surprised when they notice their previous triggers, behavior patterns and emotional responses arise again following a transformative experience. However, several also tell me that their awareness of these patterns is heightened & more timely, creating just enough space and capacity to see new choices available to them that they were unable to see prior. The more they pay attention to these physical and emotional cues, their capacity to reframe a situation and choose different reactions increases. Over time they find that they are much more equipped to self-regulate their anxiety, overwhelm & stress.
Our ability to self-regulate our emotions is the equivalent to physical recovery time when exercising. Just because someone can run up a flight of stairs quickly as they are being chased (sometimes adrenaline is our friend) does not mean that they are in good physical shape. If they are not able to catch their breath for a long period of time afterwards or cannot walk the next day, that may indicate poor physical health. The athlete who can recover quickly and return to a normal heart rate quickly stays ready for the next challenge, a sign of good physical health.
Emotional recovery time is equally important when thinking about our mental health & wellness journey. As we build our awareness, accountability and acceptance muscles through integration practices a beautiful thing happens along the way - we begin to trust ourselves again. We begin to see how strong, capable, and resilient we actually are. We gain confidence, self-worth and self-love.
I encourage clients to focus on how well they are able to self-regulate and recover from an emotional trigger rather than aim to suppress these very real emotions. In the beginning of your integration practice, I encourage you to feel each emotion, be curious about them, move through them and release them. Over time as you get better at self-regulating, you may find that new connections, insights and goals emerge. Let these unfold organically as you learn to love and trust yourself again.
Psychedelics + Design
Online Conference
Do you love psychedelics and beautiful design? Then this is the conference for you! I’m excited to join Anne Philippi, Stephanie Wang and Joyce Braverman at the Psychedelics Design online conference to discuss "Cultivating Safe Spaces: Enhancing Human Potential in Regenerative Environments."
We will dive into the importance of creating supportive and nurturing environments where individuals feel safe, respected, and empowered. We will discuss various strategies for fostering psychological safety in settings such as workplaces, educational institutions, and communities. By emphasizing the role of safe spaces in enhancing human potential, our speakers illustrate how such environments allow people to express themselves authentically and take risks without fear of judgment.
Tickets are only $28 and the lineup of panelists is outstanding. Best part: you can join from the comfort of your own couch! Be sure to follow me - I’ll be giving away a handful of free tickets throughout the month of November.
